Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
