Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
