Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Randomize