that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
