Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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