Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
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