I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
