Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
