she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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