If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
