That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
