WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
