Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
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