Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
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This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
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it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
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