what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize