You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Randomize
