I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Randomize
