so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
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