Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
