Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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