I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
