So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
