Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Randomize
