I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
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i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
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I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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