you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
