yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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