I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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