lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
i believe in u and ur pee
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize