I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
