Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize