Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard