Texts From Last Night

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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester

  (1-508): View more from Massachusetts

  Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B

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  (508): ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester (1-508): Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B http://tfl.nu/rngn
  Replies (5) Good night (1696) Bad night (652)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom

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  (586): Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom http://tfl.nu/p7m9
  Replies (4) Good night (1470) Bad night (512)
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.

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  (504): I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car. http://tfl.nu/on2m
  Replies (10) Good night (2143) Bad night (660)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college

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  (847): All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college http://tfl.nu/81f5
  Replies (40) Good night (7151) Bad night (776)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.

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  (612): I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good. http://tfl.nu/ra59
  Replies (91) Good night (6034) Bad night (1185)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in

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  (917): she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in http://tfl.nu/g0n5
  Replies (12) Good night (3341) Bad night (1194)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.

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  (541): I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god. http://tfl.nu/ci1f
  Replies (10) Good night (6277) Bad night (899)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.

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  (780): I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen. http://tfl.nu/raiw
  Replies (9) Good night (2345) Bad night (1304)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly

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  (412): My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly http://tfl.nu/ipod
  Replies (10) Good night (4936) Bad night (1083)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp

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  (443): and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp http://tfl.nu/f0ut
  Replies (32) Good night (1950) Bad night (4470)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.

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  (402): There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster. http://tfl.nu/rpfq
  Replies (2) Good night (1467) Bad night (561)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear

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  (803): at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear http://tfl.nu/8b8t
  Replies (5) Good night (1321) Bad night (636)
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  (212): View more from New York

  He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you

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  (212): He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket (617): I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you http://tfl.nu/qdni
  Replies (3) Good night (1712) Bad night (613)
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  (518): View more from New York

  And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window

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  (518): And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window http://tfl.nu/vqxj
  Replies (1) Good night (883) Bad night (378)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.

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  (563): Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up. http://tfl.nu/xba5
  Replies (0) Good night (385) Bad night (773)

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