he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
the liver wants what the liver wants
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Randomize