Grow some girl-balls and come out already
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I lost the right to judge tonight
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
