Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
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I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
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30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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