I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
