when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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