But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Randomize
