remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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