You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
