oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
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