Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
