I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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