just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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