I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Life is so much better after having sex.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Randomize