it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Randomize
