Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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