yea but for you.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.