Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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