I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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