Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
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please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
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You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
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