Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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